貳拾捌

家附近的櫻花樹

(腦殘遊記先 pause 一下來點感性的 XD)

回顧上一次寫生日感言時居然是二十五歲,怎麼不知不覺就要逼近三十大關了! 也許因為自己下意識都是以五年為劃分單位,所以 26、27 時都感覺跟 25 差不多,但一旦跨入 28 時就瞬間進位到 30 了,有種倒抽一口氣的驚悚感 XD 不過雖然在 moment of realization 的那一瞬間有種「靠腰啊這時間也未免過太快! 」的恐慌,但在恐慌幾秒後,其實還有更多興奮的期盼,就像 26 歲的我完全無法想像我現在生活的樣子,讓我更加期待──兩年後的我,會是什麼樣子呢?

過去這一年學到了很多,尤其是在人際關係這方面,讓我驚覺我的遲鈍 level 根本就是龜殼等級的 (而且還是龜殼而已,連烏龜都不是),許多想法也很幼稚,但好感謝身邊的人不僅包容力強而且還會願意誠實跟我溝通他們的心情,也讓我更真實體驗到友情的可貴! Can never thank you enough… 期許我之後可以更有 sense 地來好好愛 my loved ones :)

生日那週辦了很多事情──多半都是些不會花太多時間、但不知為何拖欠已久的零星雜事:報稅、更新駕照、辦了三張比現在福利好甚多倍的信用卡、報名路考 (該揮別跟了我十年的 N 牌了嗎?!)、衣櫃換季、以及交出了 organ donor 申請。雖然三十五歲前成家孕育新生命什麼的期許對現階段的我來說太遙遠 (老實說還是很難想像啊噢天 XD),但想到以後也許有機會可以幫忙延續另一個生命,其實是一件讓心裡倍感安慰的事情呢  這樣的動機好像有點自私,不過現在反而更有動力早睡早起好好保養身體了,所以不管怎樣應該… 也算是好事吧? XD (一定要透過這種方式喚起對健康的責任感就是了)

發明了一套有點莫名其妙,但讓自己更有效管理時間、而且儘量減少 procrastination 的系統 (畢竟自己拖拖拉拉的功力真是非比尋常)。目前還在實驗中,幾個月後如果有功效的話再來分享

希望持續二十五歲時對自己的期許,並繼續對生命懷抱熱情 :)

貼一段我很喜歡,摘自 Carl R. Rogers 的書《On Becoming a Person》的一段話:

“I believe it will have become evident why, for me, adjectives such as happy, contented, blissful, enjoyable, do not seem quite appropriate to any general description of this process I have called the good life, even though the person in this process would experience each one of these at the appropriate times. But adjectives which seem more generally fitting are adjectives such as enriching, exciting, rewarding, challenging, meaningful. This process of the good life is not, I am convinced, a life for the faint-fainthearted. It involves the stretching and growing of becoming more and more of one’s potentialities. It involves the courage to be. It means launching oneself fully into the stream of life. Yet the deeply exciting thing about human beings is that when the individual is inwardly free, he chooses as the good life this process of becoming.”

Thank you God for everything, now I can’t wait to see what you have in store for me – the good, the bad, and the process of the good life ❤︎

Mistaken Identity vineyards

3 則留言

  1. rufee wrote:

    所以感性文就沒人要留言了嗎 ;p

    But thank you so much for sharing this. What a wonderful passage. I feel that for me most of the time it is not the feeling of happiness but only the feeling of being inspired or enriched that makes me come alive (and free), and I think it is in this course of becoming that we nurture our capacity to love life. Not easy for me at all… but whenever I am around you, you set such good reminders with the love, joy and passion that you exude. It is so infectious, so thank you for continuing to share your good life with us. : ) Happy 26! ;) Love you!

    • 小 N wrote:

      Awww you are way too sweet rufi T_____T You have inspired me so much too, you probably have no idea how much but it really means a lot to me :D Thanks dear!! May we stay 26 (in 心智?) forever hahahha XDD

    • 小 N wrote:

      PS. 感性文沒人留言是因為反差太大認不出來了嗎 XDDD like oh noz this site just got hacked! loll

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